Watch Out

I just feel like I want to yell at everyone because I am so frustrated and it isn't their faults so I thought I would put my thoughts and feelings on here so I don't regret yelling at others for something they didn't do.

I am mad. I am frustrated. I am so sick of it not working out the way I want it to. I am sick of being good friends with men, 2 of them in particular this time around, who are 95% of what I am looking for and them not wanting to be with me. WTH? Then yesterday some Tinder guy was all about me and texting me all day then we become FB friends and maybe a text or 2 after. Am I that horrible to look at??! Seriously, I know I am taking this to an extreme but the timing of all of it creates that issue.

Saturday night as I am talking with Brad, I am thinking this is exactly what I am looking for. Why can't he see it in me? He is too short and lives far away. Those are my issues with him. But are those things I have overlooked because all of the other stuff is so good? Yes. Craig has is 5% missing but his other qualities overwhelm that.

I prayed that whatever was best to happen would happen on Saturday night and I believe it did. I just feel beat down with it never working. It'll pass. I will be happy where I am at again soon, I just get to have my day or 2 to be pissed and hurt about it. I am fine with what the Lord chooses and I believe one day I will be grateful, but today isn't that day. I am grateful that He knows best. I am glad that I really do believe that. I am glad that I would rather still trust in His will over my own wants. I just want it to all work out and soon.